If you’re wondering about my qualifications (as you should before you hire any self-professed “coach”), here’s some information about my background and training. Otherwise, here are some answers to some questions you may have. Click on each question to view the answer:
How exactly does your coaching work?
The Text Messaging Critique and Online Dating Profile Review are delivered via email. After you submit your payment, I’ll send you a questionnaire where you put in the appropriate information and attach images as needed. Once you send that back to me, I will send you my analysis within five business days.
The Practice Date is conducted via two video calls. After you submit your payment, I’ll send you the full details, but here’s a breakdown of the steps:
- You’ll submit your dating profile (similar to the Online Dating Profile Review process).
- I’ll pair you with a female coaching partner in a similar age bracket (if you’re 50 years old, pairing you with a 21-year-old coaching partner isn’t going to give you a good approximation of the potential dates you’ll go on).
- I’ll share your dating profile with the coaching partner, and also give you a mock profile for said partner.
- We’ll schedule a time where all three of us can meet.
- During the call, you and the coaching partner will then interact as though you are on a date. I will be a silent observer.
- Afterwards, I will review the recording and make notes.
- We will then schedule a second video call to discuss your social skills during the practice date.
The Standalone Coaching Session is similar to the above, except we schedule just the one call. During that call, we can work on specific skills of your choosing, or I can offer suggestions on what you may benefit most from working on.
How long will it take for me to develop the eight Social Savvy Sage skills?
Well, that’s really hard to say. Remember, we’re building a foundation, not slapping paint on drywall. I’m not here to give you a patchwork solution for your dating woes. I’m here to help you work on skills that literally took me 20 years to refine.
Having said that, please rest assured that I’m not in this to bleed you dry. If you prefer to be frugal, we can meet for a few sessions, get you a quick overview of the basics, and then I’ll send you away with some homework and tips for real-life practice. After that, you can reach out to me as desired if there’s anything specific you want to keep working on.
Yes, it’ll help to have someone actively coaching you on the basics. But once you get those basics down — that is to say, once your self-awareness is at a decent level — you can probably work on things yourself, without having to pay someone to coach you actively.
Ultimately, though, it’s up to you. I’m always here to help as needed. 🙂
Video calls, though? Is that going to be as effective as in-person meetings?
You’re right. Video calls are not the perfect medium for coaching, since they limit the amount of body language we can work on. I will, however, give you specific instructions on camera placement, so that we can optimize what we can see and therefore practice.
Ultimately, my goal is to provide a convenient coaching environment for people who may not have the resources or desire to travel long distances to get in-person coaching. To that end, while video calls aren’t perfect, I can assure you they will work just fine for us.
Do you only work with men? I’m interested in your coaching services, but I’m a woman.
Admittedly, Social Savvy Sage is marketed towards cis hetero men right now, because it’s easier to start with a niche. But as you may have noticed, the skills I teach aren’t confined to cis hetero men. So if you’re not otherwise a cis hetero male, and you’d like to get some coaching yourself, drop me a line below, and I’ll be happy to work out a personalized plan with you.
So level with me. Where did learn all these skills?
If you read my story, you may remember me mentioning that I’m studious. In addition to that, I also have broad interests, so that has allowed me to synthesize concepts from a wide swathe of experiences and subjects.
Here are some of the topics I draw my teachings from:
- Evolutionary biology: this is where I earned my PhD
- Teaching: I was a high school teacher for eight years
- Human psychology: which I’m currently studying as a Marriage and Family Therapist-in-training
- Professional poker: this is where I learned, shall we say, “applied human psychology”
- Customer service: yep, I worked in customer service for a few years, too
- Linguistics and communications: professional training from all of the above roles
- Public speaking: professional training while I was a teacher
- Comedy writing: something fun I’ve done on the side for several years now
- Dating and relationships writing: another side endeavor
What about your professional training?
I used to be a research scientist in evolutionary biology. Then I got a teaching credential and taught for eight years at a school for at-risk teens. That’s where I picked up my teaching, curriculum design, and counseling skills. While I was working towards my credential, I played poker professionally for a year. That was my first foray into human psychology.
While I was a teacher, I started blogging about dating and relationships on the side. That turned into quite a bit of freelance writing on dating and human behavior, a well as an invitation to contribute on a dating advice site. After that, I decided to start my own crowdsourced dating advice site. I believe that when it comes to dating and life, there often isn’t a simple one-size-fits-all answer, so my site was my attempt to offer advice-seekers more than a single perspective.
In the midst of all this, I took a job at WordPress.com for four years, where I gave a bunch of internal and external presentations on interpersonal communication. When the time came for me to move on, I decided to start Social Savvy Sage and see where I can go with this whole communications coaching thing.
Oh yeah, I’m also now going back to school to become a marriage and family therapist, so I can actually be qualified to help people when they have personal issues more serious than, “Well, how do I talk to her on a date?”
Ultimately, Social Savvy Sage was birthed from my passion for sharing the lessons I myself have learned in life.
This all sounds interesting, but I’m just not sure I’m ready to sign up for coaching yet …
Yep, I totally understand. If you’re not sure whether coaching is right for you (or more specifically, whether coaching with me is right for you), I offer a free consultation for us to get to know each other first. You can sign up for it here.
I have some other questions you didn’t answer here, you inconsiderate poop.
Sorry about that. If you have any other questions, comments, concerns, clarifications, rebuttals, etc., you can reach me directly via the contact form below.